the inevitable feelings
Sometimes what we want is often not what we need, and vice versa. That sometimes once we attain the very thing we wanted, we feel a tinge of disenchantment, we're unsure if it's real. It doesn't feel quite as we'd imagined it, it wasn't as satisfying as we'd anticipated. Our favorite doll, the one we begged and bargained for, is now atop a discarded pile of abandoned toys. Maybe it is merely human nature - we all covet something we cannot have.
Happiness is more tangible when it sneaks up on us. Someone phones you to tell you your dreams just came true, out of nowhere. You never had the opportunity to even imagine the happiness, so you experience it deeply. There was no expectation to begin with.
It is the same with pain. You get the unexpected news that a loved one is terminally ill. You're blindsided by the news, but there's time to expect and prepare. Your heart crumbles along with the strength of his body, but it is gradual and time dilutes the pain slightly. But would the loss feel graver had he died suddenly, in a fatal accident? I imagine it would, mostly because frustration would cloud the loss. Unanswered questions and regrets, there is no time for preparation. Our bodies have defenses, and we, far too often, underestimate their power.
Happiness is more tangible when it sneaks up on us. Someone phones you to tell you your dreams just came true, out of nowhere. You never had the opportunity to even imagine the happiness, so you experience it deeply. There was no expectation to begin with.
It is the same with pain. You get the unexpected news that a loved one is terminally ill. You're blindsided by the news, but there's time to expect and prepare. Your heart crumbles along with the strength of his body, but it is gradual and time dilutes the pain slightly. But would the loss feel graver had he died suddenly, in a fatal accident? I imagine it would, mostly because frustration would cloud the loss. Unanswered questions and regrets, there is no time for preparation. Our bodies have defenses, and we, far too often, underestimate their power.
